there's a lot more to do in order to break through that brick wall to head into a new world.
people keep saying, once a door keeps shut, a window will be slammed open.
whoever say this, they must be eternal optimists.
apparently, I'm not one of those Mr. Spunky.
I'm walking on to a completely opposite direction.

People keep saying, go easy on it. ooooooh,
easy, easy, uneasy. again, they have big hearts.
their "hanging-there" attitude compels my sincere admiration.
i may not be one of those who truly have balls.
any big knockdown is able to send me to a complete defeat.
then, a new life will be reborn inside my superficial physical body.
i'll start everything over again with breezes of blessing.
capitalizing on whatever it takes to believe what a reborn me believes,
i turn into an oblate dedicated to a brand-new religious life.
my own religion, norm, belief.

in short, i live with this unique fashion of multiple-time rejuvenation of me.
no sympathy, no shame, no consolation needed,
coz those could eat up energy, dampen spirit, and throw me into an utter vulnerability.
overall, i'm an optimistic pessimist who survives dramas, tons of dramas, and disorientation.